Sunday, August 24, 2008

Thai Food and Relationship Talk

We had supper at a great little Thai restaurant on Saturday night with a 30+ woman last night who is currently single. The food was really yummy – I had the Pineapple Fried Rice with Prawns, tomatoes and cashews. Mmmm.

But this blog isn’t about food – it is about relationships! So let me tell you what our friend told us about her latest relationship. Let’s call her Tanya (so she doesn’t phone me up and yell at me for telling all her secrets on the web!).

Tanya is a nurse and works in a busy downtown hospital on the surgery ward. Some days things get pretty intense on her watch. It had been one of those totally stressful days when “mister new man in her life” came along and took her out for coffee because she was having a bad day. He ordered the coffees, chatted a bit about his software business and when she was suitably settled and sipping on the latte he stop chatting and looked her directly in the eyes and said “OK, tell me about your day now.” And he just sat there, listening and nodding. Tanya said it was the greatest experience having her man just listen to her and not offer advice. She felt better about her day and was becoming definitely interested in this new man in her life.

Tanya went on to tell us that she has a male roommate – a cousin – who is in town for a 6 month contract and he has a different way of communicating. When she has a conversation with him, he is quick to interject “Did you try this” “You should do this” “It would be best if you approached it this way”. Tanya said “It is so frustrating to have a conversation with him because I feel like I’m constantly being judged and told what to do”.

Tip for men: Women need to feel their man is listening. Men can help by learning the "Mantra for Men" and practicing it often, saying to themselves, again and again... Just listen, don't give advice. Just listen, don't give advice. Just listen, don't give advice.

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